Tinker Myself

Stop existing start living

Children are your life but they have their life too…

Two caucasian and two african American children playing together

Every parent I meet or even when I see deep within me, I feel how possessive we are about are kids. We are actually not letting them grow. We want them to be close to us. We want to monitor their activity, guide them at  every moment. But I feel we are not doing the right thing to our children whether in their tender age or when they grow up. We need to learn to let go.

We need to let go our kids, to be independent. We need to allow them to make mistakes. We are too careful as we have a single child or at the max two. We are monitoring them always. It is hampering their growth. We need to mold are children in a way that even if we are not around they can survive. They don’t need to look for someone’s support, teach them to be independent.

Learn to take a back seat. Once you feel you have done your job as a parent take a back seat. Sit back relax leave your children alone, don’t interfere in their decisions. Don’t be over cautious. Life  is a journey, we need to keep learning in it. Just move on with the flow. Trust yourself.  Trust your teachings, that your child will be good.The foundation that you laid is strong don’t worry too much.

When kids grow up we start being demanding with them. They have their own life, their own troubles, don’t impose your troubles on them. Be available to them in time of need but don’t depend on them.

Your child is an independent soul, you are a source for her to come in this world. Nurture her talents, be her friend, tell the best of the things, enjoy every moment with them, but don’t be a burden to them. Everybody has only one life  and everyone has only one moment let them enjoy that.

They are a part of your life not your life, live life happily. Always remember children are your life but they have their own life too. Whether your child is infant, kid, teenager or an adult, they have their own choices, they have their own life. respect their life and they will respect yours. Be a guide to them not a stick which is always sticking around.

They want your suggestions and not your judgement. So respect your role and understand the importance of your own life. Your life is above anything else. Your child changes your life and you change her life. So handle it carefully!!

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Which school is better?

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As the teacher’s day is round the corner, I felt now a days parents are too stressed about which school to choose,which board to choose? I feel a child should be stressed towards learning.You can choose any school,any board but let the child enjoy the process of learning. learning is never ending and is not limited to any  school or institution.

A parent has to trust  the teachers,the school they decide for their child and above all faith on their child. It doesn’t matter how many marks your child gets. A child has to believed that they are unique and they will do well in life no matter what field they choose. We have to make them confident, independent and capable towards leading their life.

The most important school for a child is her home.No matter how nice a school is but if the house environment is not good then your child is not going to benefit that much. A child has to feel happy,satisfied and content in her home. If they find a harmonious environment at home they can excel.

So don’t worry about which school your child will go, or which board you choose. Just give your unconditional love to your child and undivided attention. Your child will definitely excel. Just have faith in your mother instinct. A mother is first and best teacher, a true counselor and the best guide.Just keep an eye on your child’s activity and progress.

So do as much research as you want for your child’s school. But choose a school near your place so that your child gets enough time to spend with you. So have faith in your mother instinct and trust your child, her school and teacher. The trio will do wonder.

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A moment please…

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Over the past few days I have realized that it is so difficult to live in the moment. Unconsciously we are doing everything at this point of time but think over it.Are you actually doing what you are doing or something else is going on in some part of your head at this time. You will get an answer.We are doing everything but actually we are not doing it at that time something else is also going on in our mind continuously which is no where related to the task that we are doing.

If we start doing just  what we are doing at the present time we will never be unhappy.But we are working in present time with our head in the past.That is the key to our unhappiness. It is very hard to purposely be involved in just this moment. Our head loves to wander all the way here and there. Just for 5 minutes try to be consciously involved truly to the moment.You will realize what you have been missing.I realized it a few days back and I am finding it really hard to be focused without letting my head wander in the past or somewhere else.

It is tough but it is giving me immense happiness.As it improves the quality of your work,and if the quality improves it brings happiness.There are less stressful moments because this moment has nothing else to offer other than happiness, stress was in some other moment and it is past now.

Just live in this moment you will start loving the new YOU. YOU who can always be happy and efficient in your work. Give it a try it’s worth it.

 

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Health and fitness

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People these days due to their busy schedule are forgetting the real meaning of life. People are planning everything separately. Their fitness planning, their diet planning, their financial planning. Actually everything is interrelated. They need to find the link between it, all of it is same and not different. You need to work in harmony with the elements not separately.

I see many people appreciating yoga and Ayurveda, and i feel that we should understand the importance and relevance of these two things in our life. Yoga and Ayurveda go hand in hand. They are part of life, and should be associated with one’s daily routine. People are too busy these days for many different reasons.

We need to work in harmony with our body to be able to work well and be stable financially. Our physical fitness is very important and to achieve success.

In order to stay fit you don’t need to do much. Just eat right and exercise right. Ayurveda is nothing but what you eat. If you eat right you will always stay fine. Just imagine olden days people never used to take medicine as their food habits were based on medicinal qualities it had. Ayurvedic medicines are made from these herbs that they used to eat. So if you eat properly it will help you. Food is a medicine and if medicine is taken more it will have adverse effects. Like obesity, blood pressure, cholesterol. We have forgotten that our food is our medicine and have changed its basic form just to adjust to our taste. It is very important to pay attention to what we eat. Excess of any particular food is harmful for you body. So balance out what you eat and number of times and quantity you have been taking should be observed. If you pay attention you will see that you were doing lot of things wrong and will try to rectify it.

We all are humans and control ourselves always that is the reason exercise is very important for the human body. Best exercise is not just for the body as the body is a slave of your mind. So we need an exercise which helps our mind and body both. This type of exercise is Yoga. It balances the hormones in mind and body both. So we need to eat right and exercise right.

Yoga and Ayurveda or in simple words food and exercise are key to stay fit. Just turn back to basics, there is no need to plan everything separately work in harmony with the nature and everything will fall into place.Eat right exercise for sometime, try walking, meditate while working it will cool you down. Just try to remain simple and it will help you in leading a peaceful and successful life.

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Patience

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In life I have learnt only one lesson that what ever has to happen will happen only in its due course. No body will get their due share before its time. When the appropriate time comes things will start falling into place. By cribbing, irritating, stress nothing is going to happen.

I keep getting irritated due to certain incidences and situations life bestows upon me from time to time. I get angry on my daughter, get irritated but after everything finishes start feeling guilty. Why do I do all this. What is the fault of a small baby. I regret later but what is the benefit of regretting later. The child would have hurt her feeling, would have felt annoyed at you.

There is no other solution to all the problems other than patience. We have to be patient no matter what happens. Whatever is happening is meant to happen. Time will not remain, have faith. If it is tough time it is going to pass soon. Wait patiently things will improve soon, just keep your cool. Every moment brings some change, just wait and watch what is happening. Whatever will happen it will happen for good.

 

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Gobhi Manchurian

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During rainy days we all feel like eating something tasty, yet healthy. Today I am going to share the recipe for the same.

Cauliflower 1 pcs cut into small florets

onion 1 finely chopped

garlic 4 cloves finely chopped or crushed

ginger 1/2 inch grated

cornflour 1 cup

all purpose flour(maida) 1/2 cup

rice flour 2 table spoon

spring onion chopped 1/2 cup

Method:

In a bowl mix corn flour, rice flour, maida, salt and black pepper. Add water and make a thick paste. Cover cauliflower florets and leave for half an hour. Then deep fry them till golden brown. Strain on a tissue paper and keep aside.

In a wok heat 2 tablespoon of oil add green chilies, garlic, ginger, onion and spring onion then add 1/2 cup tomato sauce sauce according to chili sauce sauce, some soya sauce, 1 tsp vinegar, little bit of sugar, salt according to taste. Make a semi liquid gravy. Add fried cauliflower just before serving otherwise they will become moist. Just toss the pieces before eating and serve hot.Garnish with chopped coriander.

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Increase your value

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I find people not happy with their current position, they are dissatisfied with the way their career path shapes, how people handle them. They are not just satisfied with what they have in life. They feel they are not respected by others, not loved by them.

What I personally feel is that firstly and most importantly respect yourself and love yourself. Don’t let others price you, set your own price. You are valuable, value yourself. Life is too short to live on others terms and conditions. Don’t let others dictate you. Increase your value and adding a new skill by brushing up your old skills. Improvement and learning should always go hand in hand.

Keep learning and keep improving. Just accept your uniqueness and your value will go up. The moment we start loving our self, we become precious. So work towards in pricing yourself correctly.

 

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Force feeding and Forced learning

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The interest towards something you do brings success along with it. Whether it is learning or eating. I associate both of them together. One of it benefits your body the other benefits your mind. But what happens when you force something? It adversely affects us. When you are interested in eating and someone feeds you forcefully, you are not benefited by it. But if you eat something by your willingness, whether the quantity is less, it gives you pleasure and good health.

Same for learning if you are studying something without interest then you won’t understand the concept. But if you like the concept and you are interested in knowing it, you will remember it always.

So never force feed your child and never force the child to learn. Let it come naturally to her. That is the reason that so much importance is being laid towards early leaning. It is because children are unaware of realities. They are like wet clay. You can mold them in your way. That is why we teach what all we want during the initial years. So that if they start enjoying it they will continue learning.

Learning happens throughout our life, it never stop. If you stop learning your life ends. Same with eating, you eat throughout your life. What you eat makes you. Again if you stop eating you die. In order to live a healthy life you need to pay attention towards  what you eat and what you learn.

If you eat only junk you can imagine what will happen to you, and if you continue learning without a proper mentor and wrong teachings, you can very well imagine what will happen to you.

What ever is happening today to eliminate it we need to eat and think right. Please pay attention towards your food and thought, and more importantly towards what you are feeding  your child in her plate and in her brain.

Live life in a healthy manner.

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Thin line difference between right and wrong

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Very often I feel that people are becoming too materialistic and are forgetting the thin line difference between right and wrong. It is very important to understand that to do what is correct is very important. The ethics are very important for us. We are letting off ethical values for momentary benefits. We think that what difference will it make. We always forget that it is very important to take the initiative, to start, people will follow and even if they don’t follow we should be confident towards what we are doing.

The population is growing and we all call ourselves educated but what is the use of education if we loose on ethics. Then why do we feel frustrated over the terrorist, with the growing terrorism, corruption. They all are doing the right thing, they all are doing what their heart desires. But do you feel that it is right?

This is the difference that I am talking about. It is hidden in the self awareness. Awareness towards good and bad. No government or NGO or any third person can bring peace. If the person is not at peace within himself we will bring turbulence in others life also.

Satisfaction is the key towards happiness. Knowledge of your limits is the secret towards prosperity. The resources are not just for you, God gave them for everyone. Let everyone enjoy them, don’t just think about yourself.

There is a increase in terrorism because people are thinking only about themselves and they feel that what they are doing is right.

If you are happy with yourself you will bring happiness in others life. Playing with someone’s life will never bring happiness. Be at peace with yourself and live life gratefully.

Whatever God has bestowed us has to be nourished and cherished and not to be exploited and demolished. Try to find the line between right and wrong, it is an invisible one but it is there. Just pay attention, it will make this world a better place to live.

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Secret to peace….

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We all get tensed, frustrated, agitated because we think too much. All we need to be happy is to live in present, live today, live this moment.What we have now will not be the same in the next moment. Thinking about too many things leave you occupied. To stay relaxed you need to be free. Free from all the belongings, from all your thoughts. The more baggage you carry the more heavier you will feel. Try to be be as light as possible.

Free your mind from all thoughts. Speak out and forget. Clinging on too long will eventually break it and here it will break you. So help out yourself. Indulge in something you like. Give time to yourself. nourish yourself, as it is you who is sailing the boat. No one else is going to do it for you.

People will always try to pull you down, it is your will power to stand by your self. To be relaxed all we need to do is live in Now. Live today, just live every moment. Life is a journey and all are passersby. We have met so many people in our life do you remember all of them? Whom you visit daily since birth? It’s you. It’s you who is the secret towards peace and how you achieve peace? By living every moment.

LIVE LIFE DON’T WASTE IT. It’s beautiful cherish it. Live whatever comes your way. Everything has a purpose. When life gives you lemons make a lemonade.

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